The best part about waking up...

No, it isn't Folders in your cup. It's the fact that you can go back to bed in 19 hours. People who shove caffeine through their face right after pulling crusty eyelids apart have too much time on their hands. I wake up with just enough time to brush my teeth and put on some pants before I need to be out the door and slightly late to wherever I happen to be going. I rush rush rush as fast as I can just so I can hope to get five hours of sleep before starting it all over again.

Yes ... No

Yes: I'm still alive

No: I'm not single anymore

Yes: I'm still broke

No: I don't see any end to my financial woes

Yes: I do plan on graduating college in May

No: I don't know if I will get to for sure

Yes: I feel sorrow for Bryce and his family

No: I didn't know him personally

What happened to the rest of the money?

I spent it all. That's right, in one week, I spent a hundred dollars of free money. Now, I didn't spend just a hundred in a week because I put some food, gas, and groceries on my debit card.

I saw my friend Kevin in Lincoln. He has a very expensive pallet and I spent $50 just trying to keep up with him. I still lost as he had one more drink then I did. Then again, he didn't have to drive 50 miles back home.

As for the other $42, well, it went towards regular live. Going out to eat, buying 1/2 price drinks from Sonics for the office, playing the Lotto.

There you have it. How a guy spends $100 of free money. Half of it on liquor, the other half on food.

Oh what luck!

So I am all moved. While I was sticking my DVD's into a new rack I was also sorting through some of my VHS tapes. What I found was wonderful. In Independence Day there was some old mowing money from when I was a kid. Two $50 bills fell out. So now I'm a hundred dollars richer then what I thought I was a day ago. Let's have some fun and track to see where this money goes, shall we?

Starting Balance...
$100

Bought some buns, pickels, and chips for a company cook out...$7
$93
Bought a powerball ticket for a company pool $1
$92

I'm moving.... again

I have a problem. I keep moving. I wish I could be happy where I'm at. It's a really nice apartment. I'm not moving to save money, in fact, I'll probably end up spending more. I'm not moving because I really hate living on my own. I love being able to poop with the door open.

I guess I'm moving because I'm a really nice guy. Joe needs someone to live with. It's weird but he just can't seem to function alone. I'm frustrated though because it's costing me so much money. Every move is at least a $300 drain on my account. I really hope I can be happy where I'm going. I hope it's large enough were I can still have my own space. What I'd really like is to own my own home though. I know it's strange for someone as young as I to want something so grand but I feel I will be truly happy with a house to call my own. I know everyone says it's the "American" dream but I'm an American and that is what I dream.

Where that house is, I'm torn. Every time I talk to, think of, am reminded of Susie and the Apache Reservation I want to leave right now to Phoenix and let God work though me. I know that is where I'm being called to serve. Yet, it's hard to think of uprooting and leaving everything I know and love here. I know I can find a good job here that pays well. I have no idea what I would do professionally if I were in AZ. Even though Phoenix/Scottsdale/Mesa/Tempe/Chandler is one of the largest cities in the United States I don't know where I would find work. It's that uncertainty that keeps me here. I have no relationships other then family I rarely see and I think God is using that fact to coax me out of this state. I love Nebraska and all that is here but I just don't feel a calling here. It's strange to have something tugging at your heart like this but I don't know what else to do with it.

I do know that the longer I sit here and type the longer I'm procrastinating on doing the dishes.

so there.

Caveing in under pressure

Ok, so it's been a while and several people are wanting more frequent updates out of me. I understand that, I don't live at home anymore and I can see how this might be the only way to keep in contact with me.

I am finally in my new apartment. Living alone is pretty cool. I get to control the thermostat and when the door is locked. Most importantly, there is no longer a raging sports fan screaming in my living room every day of the year. Joe's a great guy but he needs to understand THE TV CAN'T HEAR YOU!! It's just me. And I really didn't want to hear you arguing over something you had no control over. Anyways, moving on.

Still working. I get to do fun stuff every now and then but lately it has been pretty dull. It's fun watching cars drive up to a dead end looking for a parking space only to be disappointed and have to reverse all the way down the hill towards the overflow lot.

I'm going to the funny bone comedy club with some friends tomorrow. It should be fun. Well, it's free so of course it has to be fun.

I grilled some steaks. They were pretty good. I hate cooking all this food for only one person though. Sure, I have left overs but I'd feel much better if I was preparing for other people. See, I'll eat anything. But cooking for others makes me plan and try to do a really good job. It's a sense of pride. And I know when I do a good job but I want to see it on others faces. The steaks were marinated over night but were still dry when I got to them. Perhaps I cooked them just a hair too long but I think it more has to do with the cheap cut of meat I used. Well, that's what I am going to tell myself to make me feel better about it anyways.

It's getting late and I need to still shower and wake up in 6 hrs. I guess yet another 4 hour sleep night for me. I will learn one of these days to go to bed earlier.

Avoidance

I really have nothing to say, I just don't want to do homework at the moment. So lets go on some classic rants.

I joined Total Fark. For $5 a month or $25 for six months(what I did) you get every single fark thread submitted. For those who aren't farkers, it's a bit hard to explain. Basically, people submit news stories with funny headlines. The best 50 or so a day are posted for everyone to view, discuss, and mock. TotalFark gives you access to all of the links. But totalfark does more. It lets you into exclusive discussion threads. It is like the AOL chatrooms of yesteryear but a bit more monitored and generally full of nicer people. The community among totalfarkers is awesome. There are friendships formed and a real sense of community. I'm so glad I am now apart of it.

I went and saw Grindhouse last night. It wasn't a bad movie if you took it for face value. You definitely got your moneys worth since it was a double feature with two full length movies. We got in the theater at 9:45, it started at 10:45, and it didn't out until 2:15. That means that I was in my seat for over four hours. I wonder what else I could have done with that four hours? I could be half way to Denver if I really wanted to be.

I'm really hungry. I want Chinese.

I am falling real behind in my Perl class. I am so bad at this stuff. But...I'm almost done. While it it possible for me to fail the class, I think it would really take something special for that to happen. I keep trying and putting my best forward. There's a fine line between optomistic and idealistic. I wonder when I will cross it regarding ...everything: my degree, my future, my love life, how dinner will taste.

I bought new sneakers. The first for pleasure shoes (as in not counting safety shoes for work) I have bought in over three years. I bought my dad the same pair so now we have matching sneakers.

Speaking of dad, hows it going pops, shouldn't you be doing something productive at work? I know you have your solitare and freecell to play with. I'm sure Tony and Brian are standing behind you right now, that seems to be their favorite hangout.

So, pops and I are going to Vegas in May. Does anyone have a suggestions on what we should do? We are staying downtown and not renting a car. I'm looking for good (cheap) shows, good buffets, good bars, good spots to scope out hot women.

Making Peace

I get this phone call this morning, and notice it's a 408 area code...diffrent then mine. I answer it prepared to tell someone they have the wrong number when the following exchange takes place:
Me: "Hello?"
Caller: "I talked with your wife yesterday"
>"I'm afraid..."
>>"Now hold on, just let me make my peace without any intruptions. I talked with your wife and we decided it would be best if you went ahead and got the divorce. I love her and she doesn't want to be with you anymore. Now I'm sure this is hard for you to hear, but it needs to be said. So please just stay out of her life. "
>"Well, that's all well and good, but I'm not married and I think you have the wrong number."
>>"...Is this (says my phone number)?"
>"Well, sure, but area code 402."
>>"....."
>"Look, I hope everything works out with you and your new girlfriend."
>>"....."
>"Have a good day sir"
>>".. sorry, this is the wrong number.. sorry"



It must have taken a lot of courage for him to make that phone call, I hope he didn't lose it all with the real person he needed to make peace with.

Roommates are fun to pick on

I find my self often doing things to mess with my roommate. Nothing malicious or mean, just make him question who it is he's living with. For example...

-When ever I have a free moment when he's not here, I will change the TV channel to something odd that he nor I would watch. (think spanish music channel)

-Throw odd stuff in the toilet bowl (peanuts, bloody tissues twisted like a tampon)

-Change the operating system on the computer once a month

-Take out the trash---wait, I'm suppose to to that :P

If anyone else has some good ideas, I'm open for suggestions!

Shameless Request

I have no shame and am not below begging.

*Give it a click, you know you want to.

Check back occasionally for updates or changes.

Off to a good start (Scatterbrain Style)

-I somehow manage to screw up a quiz and not turn in a homework assignment the third week of school. Yippee for me i guess.
-I hear sirens. That happens when you live next to two major hospitals and a fire station i guess.
-It's really hard for female teacher to teach 23 white, young, male IT hotshots about diversity.
-I need new pillows, these are about as flat as can be. I bought them when I got the bed. I got the bed when I painted my old room. I painted my old room over two years ago. I need new pillows.
-My biggest fear tuesdays and thursdays is oversleeping because my class isn't until 11:30 and I can never figure out when is a good time to roll out of bed.
-I almost overslept my accounting class today because I didn't set my alarm.(I usually rely on my (now missing) cell phone.
-I lost my cell phone. That sucks. I now need to file a police report for insurance, but I don't have a phone to do it with. I did try and get it started online and put my work number down, but they didn't call yesterday and I don't go back to work until Wednesday.
- I like lava lamps
- I need a life.
- My roommate is home.
- He is complaining because they didn't have a nude model to draw in life drawing class.
- I need someone real to talk too. My usual chat buddy has fallen off the face of the earth.
- I usually try to convince myself I'm broke, but I'm not. I'm just too lazy to go out shopping for the things I need.
- I'm tired of this.

Kindness in an unkind world

I very rarely do philosophical posts, but here it goes. Today, I was kind to someone. I am kind to a lot of people and it is very far and between that I get recognition for it. It isn't that I expect or even want recondition, it is just rare when it does happen. I guess the first one I should talk about happened on Tuesday. I was visiting my old High School to reminisce the olden days, talk about what's going on now, and plan my future. As I was walking into the front doors of that pillar of education, I held the door open for an older lady. It wasn't like I walked through the doors and did that behind the back prop open thing; I stood at attention with the door open for longer then I most people do waiting for her to finish climbing the stairs and walk though the doors. She praised me and told me I was a fine young man and must have been a Burke Student. I chuckled and told her I was an alumni. We chatted for a few minutes, it turns out she was the head of the music department for the entire school district. I hold doors open for a lot of people and rarely do I get much more then a mumbled Thank You. I don't expect much more, but when more does come of it, it's nice.


I told you that story but I really wanted to tell you this story. Today at Burger King (yes, I do occasionally eat at that unhealthy greasepit time to time) I was incredibly kind to my cashier. I stood tall, spoke clearly and looked her in the eye. I also greeted her with a good morning and continuously said my pleases and thank yous. It was her reaction to all of the attention that struck me as odd. Now before you get any idears in your head, I was not hitting on her, simply being polite. Now, while I attempted to make eye contact, she would constantly look away at ether the counter or her feet. Every now and then she would stammer or trip over her words when I am sure she is capable of saying "Cheeseburgers." There was no line and I showed tremendous patients for her, but she still fumbled with a receipt and seemed rushed to get my my drink cup. I was polite to her and she seemed intimidated by it. I was not in a $5,000 suit, just a polo and blue jeans. I did not drive up in a limo or supercar, just my old four banger. There was nothing to be intimidated by other then kindness. It is like she didn't know how to handle it. In her line of work, there can't be too many patent and kind people come through her line. When one does, she didn't know how to act. I could have it all wrong, perhaps she had a handicap that I am missing to pick up on, but I doubt it. I guess where I'm going with all of this is perhaps we should all stop being in such a big rush all the time and be a little more polite to our fellow humans so when someone does come along with compassion, we know how to act.

New Semester

It looks like I'm back in school again. Classes are going to be a lot of work, but if I can better manage my time, and if I can keep on top of the assignments, I'll do just fine. In other words, I'm screwed.

One of the best Christmases ever

This has to go down as one of the better Christmases ever. It started Christmas eve when my mom could find the time in her schedule to come over for more then an hour and spend time with us. We had a wonderful dinner lovingly prepared by my father. Then we opened gifts and departed. The reason why we had to open gifts on Christmas Eve instead of the day is because my mom had "something else going on." I didn't ask, she didn't tell. I won't lie, it bothered me that we had re-arrange our lives...again...around her schedule. If fact, it bothered me a lot. What was I to do on Christmas day without spending time with my entire family? I had an idea, I would call up some friends and get drunk. That's the ole holiday spirit, right? This is coming from a kid who hates even having alcohol at his residence and has never been drunk before. Yep, I was pretty down. But when Christmas day came, Joe called me up and invited me to his parents for dinner. Ok, I tell myself, it looks like I will have something to do today. So while I am Joe's watching his brother play Guitar Hero II and hanging out with his older brother and brand new wife, I get a call from the Stevens. They wouldn't mind if I came over and had some fun with them. I say, OK, and head over there after dinner. I was at the Stevens until 2am. Quite possibly the latest I have ever seen Mrs. Stevens awake. While I was there, Ben called me up and said Kristin was hanging out at his apartment. I decided, OK, I'll head over there and have some fun. And fun it was. I always enjoy hanging out with Ben and having a female present is always a plus. I didn't get out of there until 5am. I get home and realize that my alarm is going to go off in an hour, so there is really no use in going to bed. I ate some Raisin Bran for breakfast and took a shower. Now here I sit, watching Sunrise Earth over Costa Rica on Discovery HD typing in my blog and getting ready for work. I have 0% sleep and a manditory 12-13 hr workday ahead of me, but at least I had fun the night before!