One of the best Christmases ever
This has to go down as one of the better Christmases ever. It started Christmas eve when my mom could find the time in her schedule to come over for more then an hour and spend time with us. We had a wonderful dinner lovingly prepared by my father. Then we opened gifts and departed. The reason why we had to open gifts on Christmas Eve instead of the day is because my mom had "something else going on." I didn't ask, she didn't tell. I won't lie, it bothered me that we had re-arrange our lives...again...around her schedule. If fact, it bothered me a lot. What was I to do on Christmas day without spending time with my entire family? I had an idea, I would call up some friends and get drunk. That's the ole holiday spirit, right? This is coming from a kid who hates even having alcohol at his residence and has never been drunk before. Yep, I was pretty down. But when Christmas day came, Joe called me up and invited me to his parents for dinner. Ok, I tell myself, it looks like I will have something to do today. So while I am Joe's watching his brother play Guitar Hero II and hanging out with his older brother and brand new wife, I get a call from the Stevens. They wouldn't mind if I came over and had some fun with them. I say, OK, and head over there after dinner. I was at the Stevens until 2am. Quite possibly the latest I have ever seen Mrs. Stevens awake. While I was there, Ben called me up and said Kristin was hanging out at his apartment. I decided, OK, I'll head over there and have some fun. And fun it was. I always enjoy hanging out with Ben and having a female present is always a plus. I didn't get out of there until 5am. I get home and realize that my alarm is going to go off in an hour, so there is really no use in going to bed. I ate some Raisin Bran for breakfast and took a shower. Now here I sit, watching Sunrise Earth over Costa Rica on Discovery HD typing in my blog and getting ready for work. I have 0% sleep and a manditory 12-13 hr workday ahead of me, but at least I had fun the night before!
Something Wrong Here?
I live in Nebraska. It is December. As I look out my window for the past two days, I see not snow, but rain. Something is wrong here. Why is it above 37 degrees here? Why is there not a giant sheet of ice for me to skid around and play on? These things I don't know, and I may never know.
Ahhhhhh
Ahhh, school's done for the semester. This is the best time of the year, nothing to worry about but waking up in time for work. No homework due Monday night, no papers due on Wednesday...Nothing. This time of year is the time to sit back and relax. But I can't. You know why? My sister is loosing it. Jenny, I am coming out here to the blogosphere to out you. There are more people that read this thing then just you and dad. I have followers who will vigorously check this thing on a daily basis waiting for something new to read. Well folks, here it is. Jenny, you are not special. There, I said it. My sister is not a unique flower with pedals of angst that fall just to her. I know you wish you could stop reading this now, but you won't be able to...and here is why. You do not live inside your own little world. You wish you did, but believe it or not, your actions effect other people then your selfish self. Don't believe me? In one week, you will have more people praying over your soul then you will ever know. Because you need help, Jenny. We all love you and don't want to see you harm yourself. I know you think you are all talk, but thoughts do lead to actions. When you keep thinking you want to kill yourself over and over again, you are going to act on it sooner or later. Ever tell a lie so much that you convinced yourself that it was true? This is the same principle. You need help, Jenny. There are people out there to help you. Don't worry about the cost, you can see a therapist for free under all three of my jobs. Hopefully, you are willing to let them help you Jenny. You need help because you are not unique. You are not the only one who breaks up with people Jenny. There are other people out there who can relate to you and help you. The first thing you need to do is get help. After that, you need to get your priorities in line. Did you ever stop and think why all of these guys are treating you the way that they do? It is because you have low self-esteem Jenny. One way to help that is to feel better about yourself. It isn't that hard, do something you like! Or I know, how about improve yourself just a little bit every day. Say, by bringing your math grade up. What you get in school is none of my concern. I won't lie and tell you that I care a great deal about your academic proformance. It isn't like it effects my grades at all. This isn't communist grading here. But here is where it does affect me. You have low self-esteem. That does effect me because it causes you to go out with (older) guys willing to exploit that. So, say, you bring your grades up. It really isn't that hard. One, do your homework. Two, when the teacher does a problem on the board, write it down so you can look at it later for studying or homework problems. Three, study for your tests. Now, studying for tests isn't that hard. Here is the quick and dirty way to doing it. Go back to half of the homework problems that gave you trouble, and half that were super easy. Redo the super easy one's first. This will raise your confidance and refresh your mind along with getting it in the study mode. Then, go back and do a few that gave you problems. Don't do the absolute hardest one, you will just get frustrated with yourself and feel like a failure. To some challenging, but not impossible. Spend maybe an hour on this. No TV, No computer, Low music volume, preferably on classical. Your grades will go up if you follow this. Now Jenny, when your grades start to go up, your confidence and self esteem will go up. If you have the willpower to work on your personal appearance, your self-esteem will go up a lot. Especially when you have guys your own age attracted to you. Don't tell me that you have a ton of guys your age hitting on you now, I was 16/17 once and that's a load of crap. Now image what will happen to your self esteem if you actually start passing all of your classes (good job in history, btw) AND stop attracting scum, bottom of the barrel pedofiles. Then, you won't feel as much to take your own life. Don't believe me? Why do you think I lost all of my weight? It sure wasn't for Tommy Jeans. I wanted to attract a female. I was feeling pretty depressed and bad about myself because no matter how hard I tried, no matter how many girls I asked, I couldn't get a date. You may be asking "What about now Jeff, your the man with the job and the man with a somewhat slender figure and the man with halfway decent grades." To that I answer, I'm TOO BUSY!!! Plus, I'm not hanging around high schools praying on insecure sophomores just because I know they are willing to whatever I ask of them just so I can leave them to the side of the road when something better comes along.
To summarize:
- I'm glad finals are done
- Jenny has some serious issues she needs with a trained professional
- Jenny needs to bring up her self esteem
- get better grades
- loose a few pounds
- stop attracting creepy people
Finals Loom Ahead
Everybody always makes such a big deal out of finals. Really, they are just like every other test out there. Some professors will make it cumulative, some will not. Some will make it worth more points, others don't. Some finals are in the exact same format as every other test in that class but have a longer time limit. People who complain about dead week not being utilized by the professors, get over it. During finals week, you have no other classes with new learning. Can't say the same about midterms, can you. There is really no warrant for this post. I just felt the need to throw something up here the day of my first final. I should/could have studied a bit more for it. But this statistics stuff is so over my head that I don't think I would know how. I fear the employer that actually expects me to utilize any of this stuff after I get my sheet of paper from the University.
